WOW!!
My time has actually come. I thought about this day all year but it never felt like it would actually come. I have seen around a hundred people come and go, and I never thought it would be my turn..but here I am. I cant sum up this year in a sentence or a post all I can say is that this year was God...I think that kinda sums it up. I hope in everything I did and in all my interactions that it was all about God. He gave me the strength, provided for me, taught me and gently led me as I learned how to better serve Him. What an incredible Father we serve!
For some time now I have been praying for peace and closure as I leave. I knew this week was going to be really hard when I had to say goodbye to my team early Tuesday as they left for the village. Let me just say I am so blessed to have been able to serve with such and incredible people, I love them very much! I just kept praying that God would work this week and help me to leave knowing I fulfilled my purpose for being here. I started Tuesday morning by going to a primary school, I got to sing songs with the kids and take pictures. Then the teachers called a meeting and then just spent time thanking me for the time I spent there. I was so blessed! The next morning I went to the children's hospital and once again sang songs with them and they sang farewell songs to me and made me a card. Then I went to two other primary schools to say goodbye. That night I had small group and they took time to thank me for the time I spent there. I am so blessed to have been able to get into community with brothers and sisters from Uganda! They have been a huge God-send for me! This afternoon I said goodbye to the kids at the Juvenile home and then got to hang out with a friend from last year. We had a such a great time and then met up with my British friends and had such a great night talking about spiritual things and fellowshipping. God has constantly reminded me this week how blessed I am and how great this year was! He also allowed me to see that I was a blessing in my time here. I think sometimes we never know, but He allowed me to see the impact I have been able to make. I am so thankful for that! But whatever recognition I got that is just all the more witness to how great God is. If anything good came through me this year it was all Him! I know myself, I am so selfish and prideful. Any love was from Him! It so awesome to see the fruit of Him using me as His vessel! Praise HIM!
So here I go. The journey continues as I go home. I am so expectant and ready for all God has for me there! I am ready to hug my family and friends and hang out! I am ready to serve God, even though it will be much more challenging to do from America. I am excited to see how He works in me and grows me in this next stage of the wonderful journey He has me on. I trust Him...fully. I love Him. I want to serve Him. I want to die for Him daily. I need wisdom. It will be hard. I will miss this place and these kids with all of my heart. I don't need Africa though, all I need is my God! The most comforting thought in the world to me is that God is the same God in Africa as He is in America! He is and will always be perfectly faithful! Lets take the world for Him!
I really appreciate prayer as I travel home and as I begin this new part of my life! There will be a lot of adjusting to be done and a lot to mull over and process. Please pray that God gives me incredible peace and wisdom. I love you all and will hopefully see you very soon!
Craig
"For I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." Philippians 4:11-13
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Rwanda-God is faithful!
Rwanda, Rwanda, Rwanda. What a strange but incredible week. I went in with expectations, but like God most often does He took our trip the completely opposite way. Here is a little overview of the week:
Day 1- Saturday: Set out on our bus for Kigali, Rwanda. Four hours outside of Kampala we broke down. We then sat there for 12 hours while we waited for another bus to come and pick us up. That was the first little curve ball. We had planned on getting to Kigali early Saturday morning to get acquainted with the city and find a place to stay. Instead, we arrived around 11 at night and had to find our way in the dark. We finally found this church that had quest rooms. Sleep.
Day 2- Sunday: Woke up and went to an internet cafe in hopes of finding a place to stay. Afterward, we went to the genocide museum. It was beyond sad. It is hard for me to imagine that there is so much evil in this world. It reminded me that there is such a huge battle going on and I need to be a light in a very dark and evil world. We then went back to the church. We had discovered that morning that the language barrier was almost insurmountable. People in Kigali only speak Kinyarwanda or French. There were only a few people we came in contact with that spoke decent English. We also realized we were going to be spending a lot of money on housing. We had exchanged money in Kampala and were already almost out. We were extremely discouraged and wondering if we were even supposed to be there. Then we just sat down and prayed. We took time to give it up and seek God. We then decided to just go to a slum called Gatenga we had found on the internet. When we got there we spent a few hours just loving kids, handing out hot dog buns and hanging out with a family that welcomed us in to their home. It was such a blessing and rejuvenated our hearts and our joy. That night at the church I thought about my entire year in Africa and how God has been constantly faithful. He had once again proven His faithfulness. I stood in awe of Him.
Day 3- Monday: Once again discouraged. We had run out of our initial money. We started thinking about leaving early. Isn't it crazy how we so quickly forget how faithful God is? Anyways, so we once again were freaking out and again decided to just give it up to God. We then decided to go this other slum that we had found on the internet. It had worked once. When we got there we realized it wasn't a slum at all, instead it was one of the richest areas of Kigali. We started walking and found a ministry called PEACE Plan. We decided to go in and we talked to the guy in charge. We asked if there was anything he knew of that we could do and he made a call and told us he would get back to us. We left and went back to Gatenga where we had gone the day before and we hung out with the same family. We then got a call from the guy at PEACE Plan telling us to meet this pastor guy that evening. My cousin had also put me in contact with a guy he had met a few years back named Arthur so we were going to meet him as well. We went to coffee and started talking to the pastor who we called Pastor Jackson. He started telling us of a school he runs and how he would love for us to come and help him out. Then Arthur came and it turns out he had worked with PEACE plan for a few years and also knew the guy we had first talked to. He now works for an NGO called Living Water and knows a good friend of Kyle (one the guys I was with) who we had been in contact with before we left. Crazy. We decided to put out our need of a place to stay because staying at the church was eating our money. Arthur then spoke up and told us we could crash at his place.
Day 4, 5 and 6: We ended up staying with Arthur for the next three nights for free. The pastor paid for most of our dinners. We had each spent over 60 dollars each in the first two days. We spent around 20 each the next 3 days. GOD IS FAITHFUL!!!!!! How do I ever doubt Him? Arthur took us in and told us everything we needed to know. He drove us around the city and introduced us to a lot of people. He was such a God-send! We spent the next three mornings working at Pastor Jackson's school. We quickly fell in love with the kids there. There is so much that is needed at the school, but the pastor is doing such a great thing. His heart is amazing. Please pray for him as he tries to run this school and a church with barely any resources or support. We were able to buy a few supplies for them. We also spent the afternoons in Gatenga with "our family." There was this adorable baby named Esther that we all fell in love with. We got to buy her shoes our last day, but she treated them more as food than something to wear. Oh well, she liked them. :) As three guys we had a such an incredible time together. There was so much laughter and many deep conversations. I am blessed to know them and call them brothers!
We left Thursday night sad to leave Rwanda but also excited to get back to Kampala where we feel at home and we are known and the people speak English. There were thankfully no problems on the way home.
God is so incredible! I am so thankful for the experience and being able to see more of God's world. I went in expecting a very impoverished city but found Kigali to be a very nice city with great infrastructure. God showed me that I don't have to just look for the poor. The slums don't just need Jesus. Everyone does. Just because I am somewhere nice doesn't mean the hope of Christ and the love of God should be neglected. As I go back to America God is challenging me to love and serve everyone and spread His hope! I will end this post with the greatest understatement ever: "God is good!"
Day 1- Saturday: Set out on our bus for Kigali, Rwanda. Four hours outside of Kampala we broke down. We then sat there for 12 hours while we waited for another bus to come and pick us up. That was the first little curve ball. We had planned on getting to Kigali early Saturday morning to get acquainted with the city and find a place to stay. Instead, we arrived around 11 at night and had to find our way in the dark. We finally found this church that had quest rooms. Sleep.
Day 2- Sunday: Woke up and went to an internet cafe in hopes of finding a place to stay. Afterward, we went to the genocide museum. It was beyond sad. It is hard for me to imagine that there is so much evil in this world. It reminded me that there is such a huge battle going on and I need to be a light in a very dark and evil world. We then went back to the church. We had discovered that morning that the language barrier was almost insurmountable. People in Kigali only speak Kinyarwanda or French. There were only a few people we came in contact with that spoke decent English. We also realized we were going to be spending a lot of money on housing. We had exchanged money in Kampala and were already almost out. We were extremely discouraged and wondering if we were even supposed to be there. Then we just sat down and prayed. We took time to give it up and seek God. We then decided to just go to a slum called Gatenga we had found on the internet. When we got there we spent a few hours just loving kids, handing out hot dog buns and hanging out with a family that welcomed us in to their home. It was such a blessing and rejuvenated our hearts and our joy. That night at the church I thought about my entire year in Africa and how God has been constantly faithful. He had once again proven His faithfulness. I stood in awe of Him.
Day 3- Monday: Once again discouraged. We had run out of our initial money. We started thinking about leaving early. Isn't it crazy how we so quickly forget how faithful God is? Anyways, so we once again were freaking out and again decided to just give it up to God. We then decided to go this other slum that we had found on the internet. It had worked once. When we got there we realized it wasn't a slum at all, instead it was one of the richest areas of Kigali. We started walking and found a ministry called PEACE Plan. We decided to go in and we talked to the guy in charge. We asked if there was anything he knew of that we could do and he made a call and told us he would get back to us. We left and went back to Gatenga where we had gone the day before and we hung out with the same family. We then got a call from the guy at PEACE Plan telling us to meet this pastor guy that evening. My cousin had also put me in contact with a guy he had met a few years back named Arthur so we were going to meet him as well. We went to coffee and started talking to the pastor who we called Pastor Jackson. He started telling us of a school he runs and how he would love for us to come and help him out. Then Arthur came and it turns out he had worked with PEACE plan for a few years and also knew the guy we had first talked to. He now works for an NGO called Living Water and knows a good friend of Kyle (one the guys I was with) who we had been in contact with before we left. Crazy. We decided to put out our need of a place to stay because staying at the church was eating our money. Arthur then spoke up and told us we could crash at his place.
Day 4, 5 and 6: We ended up staying with Arthur for the next three nights for free. The pastor paid for most of our dinners. We had each spent over 60 dollars each in the first two days. We spent around 20 each the next 3 days. GOD IS FAITHFUL!!!!!! How do I ever doubt Him? Arthur took us in and told us everything we needed to know. He drove us around the city and introduced us to a lot of people. He was such a God-send! We spent the next three mornings working at Pastor Jackson's school. We quickly fell in love with the kids there. There is so much that is needed at the school, but the pastor is doing such a great thing. His heart is amazing. Please pray for him as he tries to run this school and a church with barely any resources or support. We were able to buy a few supplies for them. We also spent the afternoons in Gatenga with "our family." There was this adorable baby named Esther that we all fell in love with. We got to buy her shoes our last day, but she treated them more as food than something to wear. Oh well, she liked them. :) As three guys we had a such an incredible time together. There was so much laughter and many deep conversations. I am blessed to know them and call them brothers!
We left Thursday night sad to leave Rwanda but also excited to get back to Kampala where we feel at home and we are known and the people speak English. There were thankfully no problems on the way home.
God is so incredible! I am so thankful for the experience and being able to see more of God's world. I went in expecting a very impoverished city but found Kigali to be a very nice city with great infrastructure. God showed me that I don't have to just look for the poor. The slums don't just need Jesus. Everyone does. Just because I am somewhere nice doesn't mean the hope of Christ and the love of God should be neglected. As I go back to America God is challenging me to love and serve everyone and spread His hope! I will end this post with the greatest understatement ever: "God is good!"
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Rwanda!
Hello everyone!
I can hardly believe I only have two weeks remaining in my time here. I have incredibly mixed emotions; heart broken to leave these beautiful children and this place I've called home, yet excited and expectant for what God has for me in America.
This past month has been quite the journey. God has taught me so much through dealing with this arthritis. He has used it to humble me, teach me to trust in Him and teach me to have joy. I see this whole thing as such a huge blessing, I wouldn't change it. It's incredible to be in so much pain to the point where I can't move but be still be so thankful that in a few hours I'll be able to stand up and walk unlike so many people. God is so faithful! Praise be to Him!
Another thing I have been dealing with and wrestling with is trying to figure out what it means to really follow Jesus. I have now spent a year here and I have loved it, but I am so comfortable here. I feel like I could live here by myself and be completely fine. In some ways I feel way more comfortable here than I ever did in America. We live in a nice house with nice stuff and decent internet. There is nothing wrong with that, I just have been finding it hard to really follow Christ in my comfort and being surrounded by so much stuff. Another issue I have is pride. Being surrounded by so many volunteers has been a challenge. I want to be liked, so I try to impress at times and in that lose focus of glorifying God. That's so dangerous! I just have had a crazy conviction in my heart recently to do more and to step out more, somewhere where my comfort level is very low. The other day it all accumulated and I was so frustrated and I just cried out to God asking Him to show me what I needed to do. Then it happened. You know, one of those God things where you know it has to be Him. Me and two of my buddies here were sitting outside late at night on the 4th of July talking. First of all, I just wanted to be sleeping but for some reason I got out of bed and went outside where I found them talking. So we began to talk, and eventually we started talking about what God had been doing in our hearts. We started sharing and found out that we were all pretty much at the same place. We needed to do something. Then my buddy Gabe said, "Let's go to Rwanda!" And of course we were like "YEAH!" So we researched that night and got pumped about the idea. The next morning, yesterday, we talked to our director and he said he had to pray about it. This week we are praying and fasting here at EAC so all of us were committing that time to praying about this trip and our intentions. This morning we approached him again and he questioned us to make sure our hearts were in the right place. Then he told us that months ago he had started planning to go to Rwanda during his trip here, but since his wife is pregnant he needs to be home with her and he is leaving Monday. The crazy thing is that he would have been going to Rwanda the exact week that we are going! Completely separate convictions to go, same God...awesome! So with all this being said we are packing up and heading to Rwanda on Friday night for a week! Our goal is to just go expecting God to do huge things. It might sound crazy, but it just makes sense! We want to go and live in a slum in Kigali, the capitol city, and spend a week loving people, working with them and sharing the Gospel with them in an environment where we are completely out of our comfort zones. I truly believe God is going to do huge things!
I would love for you to be a part of this!
1. Prayer- we need it! Please pray for health as we are being attacked in that, safety, for God to prepare the place we are supposed to go and to make peoples hearts soft towards the Gospel.
2. Financial- in two ways. First, it will cost a little bit of money to get there and to stay for a week. Second, it would be wonderful to have money to use to buy Bibles for the people we meet or buy meals for the hungry or for whatever needs we come across.
You can contact me on facebook or at crazy4him92@sbcglobal.net.
I have never been comfortable asking for money, but this isn't about me or for me! This is for God's Kingdom. Huge things could come as a result of this trip. EAC has asked us to bring back a report of what is happening in Rwanda, so that in the future they can start a branch there. How wonderful to be a part of the beginning of something that could change thousands of lives for Jesus!!
Thank you so much for reading this! I love all of you and am so thankful for all of your support this past year! You have been a blessing to me!
Craig
"How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"-Romans 10:15. I want beautiful feet!
I can hardly believe I only have two weeks remaining in my time here. I have incredibly mixed emotions; heart broken to leave these beautiful children and this place I've called home, yet excited and expectant for what God has for me in America.
This past month has been quite the journey. God has taught me so much through dealing with this arthritis. He has used it to humble me, teach me to trust in Him and teach me to have joy. I see this whole thing as such a huge blessing, I wouldn't change it. It's incredible to be in so much pain to the point where I can't move but be still be so thankful that in a few hours I'll be able to stand up and walk unlike so many people. God is so faithful! Praise be to Him!
Another thing I have been dealing with and wrestling with is trying to figure out what it means to really follow Jesus. I have now spent a year here and I have loved it, but I am so comfortable here. I feel like I could live here by myself and be completely fine. In some ways I feel way more comfortable here than I ever did in America. We live in a nice house with nice stuff and decent internet. There is nothing wrong with that, I just have been finding it hard to really follow Christ in my comfort and being surrounded by so much stuff. Another issue I have is pride. Being surrounded by so many volunteers has been a challenge. I want to be liked, so I try to impress at times and in that lose focus of glorifying God. That's so dangerous! I just have had a crazy conviction in my heart recently to do more and to step out more, somewhere where my comfort level is very low. The other day it all accumulated and I was so frustrated and I just cried out to God asking Him to show me what I needed to do. Then it happened. You know, one of those God things where you know it has to be Him. Me and two of my buddies here were sitting outside late at night on the 4th of July talking. First of all, I just wanted to be sleeping but for some reason I got out of bed and went outside where I found them talking. So we began to talk, and eventually we started talking about what God had been doing in our hearts. We started sharing and found out that we were all pretty much at the same place. We needed to do something. Then my buddy Gabe said, "Let's go to Rwanda!" And of course we were like "YEAH!" So we researched that night and got pumped about the idea. The next morning, yesterday, we talked to our director and he said he had to pray about it. This week we are praying and fasting here at EAC so all of us were committing that time to praying about this trip and our intentions. This morning we approached him again and he questioned us to make sure our hearts were in the right place. Then he told us that months ago he had started planning to go to Rwanda during his trip here, but since his wife is pregnant he needs to be home with her and he is leaving Monday. The crazy thing is that he would have been going to Rwanda the exact week that we are going! Completely separate convictions to go, same God...awesome! So with all this being said we are packing up and heading to Rwanda on Friday night for a week! Our goal is to just go expecting God to do huge things. It might sound crazy, but it just makes sense! We want to go and live in a slum in Kigali, the capitol city, and spend a week loving people, working with them and sharing the Gospel with them in an environment where we are completely out of our comfort zones. I truly believe God is going to do huge things!
I would love for you to be a part of this!
1. Prayer- we need it! Please pray for health as we are being attacked in that, safety, for God to prepare the place we are supposed to go and to make peoples hearts soft towards the Gospel.
2. Financial- in two ways. First, it will cost a little bit of money to get there and to stay for a week. Second, it would be wonderful to have money to use to buy Bibles for the people we meet or buy meals for the hungry or for whatever needs we come across.
You can contact me on facebook or at crazy4him92@sbcglobal.net.
I have never been comfortable asking for money, but this isn't about me or for me! This is for God's Kingdom. Huge things could come as a result of this trip. EAC has asked us to bring back a report of what is happening in Rwanda, so that in the future they can start a branch there. How wonderful to be a part of the beginning of something that could change thousands of lives for Jesus!!
Thank you so much for reading this! I love all of you and am so thankful for all of your support this past year! You have been a blessing to me!
Craig
"How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"-Romans 10:15. I want beautiful feet!
Sunday, June 12, 2011
When you can no longer walk, just give it up!
Hey everyone!
God has taught me a lot recently, but I really feel like I need to share with you what He has been teaching me over the past few days.
I had pink eye a few weeks ago and from that I got Reactive Arthritis, which is very painful. One of the main things it has caused is intense foot pain which started over a week ago and then led to knee swelling and weakness both in my right leg. As a result I haven’t really been able to walk and had to stay home from all projects this past week. To be honest I treated it completely wrong. I was bitter and void of joy. I failed at loving people, and instead focused on myself. But then God started opening up my eyes Friday. I was supposed to go to the village this week and I couldn’t which frustrated me so much. When the team got back on Friday they all shared their experiences and how they were encouraged by one another and challenged by the experiences and people in the village. I felt so left out. But I realized I wanted people to say I was the encouragement. I wanted to be the center of attention. No one mentioned me. If anything I was a hindrance to others. I wanted to be the leader, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t do anything but sit at home. I was helpless. That’s how we are as Christians. We are helpless without Christ. We can’t do anything. We aren’t enough, we can’t love or serve well, and we definitely can’t please God well.
I woke up this morning and the pain had spread to my other foot, I couldn’t even stand up. I needed to shower so I used a chair as a walker and then had to shower sitting in it like an old person. Helpless. Hopeless. Because of this and other things going on in my life I decided to read over Galations 5 and pray through the fruits of the Spirit. Then the next verse that follows that section hit me like never before. Galations 5:25 says, “If we live by the Spirit then we will walk BY the Spirit.” That word, by, struck me. I don’t if it’s just a different translation but I have always read it as we walk WITH the Spirit. Yes, same idea, but I am struck by the word and idea of walking BY the Spirit. I haven’t been able to walk this week. I have had to be very intentional about where I try to walk to and only go if I really have to. I couldn’t walk in my own power, which is incredibly humbling. I never really think about walking, until I’ve been blessed (that’s how we should view it) to walk or run a long distance and then they hurt and then I complain about them. But not being able to use them at all is very difficult. As Christian’s we need to get to the point where we can admit that we can’t walk on our own. That we aren’t enough. We have to give up our self-reliance and our desire for our own glory, and replace it with Spirit-reliance and a desire to give God ALL of the glory. We need to get to a place where we don’t try to walk and we can’t walk unless it is the Spirit empowering us to and leading us. Our life’s will only be hopeless and helpless and an unending need for others to glorify us, unless we can walk BY the Spirit for the glory of God. Then, He will lift us up and allow us to be a part of bringing His name glory. What a beautiful paradox!! God wants to use us. All He requires us to do is rely on His infinite and perfect strength, allow His perfection to take over our imperfection, and then as a result go and bring glory to His incredible name. Sounds like a great deal to me! God owes me nothing, and I owe Him all. We all do. Let’s live it and let the Spirit be our feet.
"All of my life, in every season, you are still God, and I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship!"-Dessert Song by Hillsong
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Who am I?
Dear friends,
Summer has begun and it has been getting more and more crazier around here. The people have been great, but with more people everything that I talked about in my last blog post has come into play. This whole year has been a challenge in humility, but now more than ever I am being broken. I have to step back and let others lead, which is not easy for me, but it even goes much deeper than that. The fact is I am SUPER prideful. God has been showing me that more than ever before. Sometimes I just have to scream cause it hurts so bad to have to constantly be letting go of myself. I have had to rely on Him more than ever. But the crazy thing is that it's a good kind of pain. It's so necessary. I can never truly serve God until I can completely let go of me and my desires. I welcome this, no matter how hard it gets. I am nothing. Truly nothing. I know that, but I want to live it. In Isaiah 40 it says that before God we are as nothing, even less than nothing. I come before God so many times as if I have something to offer him; that's crazy. I have struggled because now I am realizing through having so many people here that I am not the best, not the funniest, not the most talented, not the most godly. I want to be. I want people to like me the most, to want to spend time with me, to think I'm great. But the more I want that and I seek that the harder it has become to serve God and give the glory to Him.
Today we went for basketball practice (we are all really bad so we need practice to be able to play against schools) and I was just really discouraged. I had to walk home by myself cause I needed to get back to go to small group. I was crying out to God and then I met a girl who is in highschool and got to walk and talk to her for a bit, then I met a group of kids and got to hang out with them for awhile, then I got to talk to an older lady. God gave me three little reminders of why I am here. I am here for to serve these people. Not when other people are around watching, but love them from a pure heart with the love from God. Man sees the deeds but God sees the heart behind the deeds. I just want Him to be able to look at my heart and smile because everything I do is for Him and for His glory. I say all this because I think that this is something we all deal with constantly. Maybe in different ways, but we all struggle with pride everyday. Satan puts this lie into each of our minds that we are the best, and that hinders us from serving Christ and coming together as the body of Christ. We need to become real and authentic, we need to be able to admit that we are prideful and messed up. I feel dumb having to admit how prideful I am, because it looks ridiculous but it's necessary. We need to keep each other in step. We are all just beggars showing other beggars where there is bread. If we can really understand that we are nothing and choose to live it out every day then God is going to use us to great things: not for ourselves but for His glory! How beautiful!
This past weekend we went out to the village to break ground for the training center that is going to be built there. It was such a wonderful day. I remember when I got here a year ago, all this was just a dream and plans on paper, but it is coming true and I feel so blessed to be here when all this is coming together. The plan is over the next 10 years a compound is going to be built consisting of a primary and a secondary school, a church, a trade school and dorms for kids and staff to live in. I am excited for how this is going to be used to bless so many lives and how it is going to bless the people in the community. The community came together for the ground breaking ceremony and we had a great party together. People are so excited for what is happening out there! Please pray that God will provide all the funds that are needed and that everything will go smoothly. Satan doesn't want this to happen so pray against his schemes!
I only have two months left! I can't believe it! I will be seeing you all so soon! I am so excited. I am seriously missing people back home more than ever! I love you! I would appreciate continued prayers. Please pray that God would give me the grace to be broken and to become less and less this summer so that He can become more! God bless!!
Craig
Summer has begun and it has been getting more and more crazier around here. The people have been great, but with more people everything that I talked about in my last blog post has come into play. This whole year has been a challenge in humility, but now more than ever I am being broken. I have to step back and let others lead, which is not easy for me, but it even goes much deeper than that. The fact is I am SUPER prideful. God has been showing me that more than ever before. Sometimes I just have to scream cause it hurts so bad to have to constantly be letting go of myself. I have had to rely on Him more than ever. But the crazy thing is that it's a good kind of pain. It's so necessary. I can never truly serve God until I can completely let go of me and my desires. I welcome this, no matter how hard it gets. I am nothing. Truly nothing. I know that, but I want to live it. In Isaiah 40 it says that before God we are as nothing, even less than nothing. I come before God so many times as if I have something to offer him; that's crazy. I have struggled because now I am realizing through having so many people here that I am not the best, not the funniest, not the most talented, not the most godly. I want to be. I want people to like me the most, to want to spend time with me, to think I'm great. But the more I want that and I seek that the harder it has become to serve God and give the glory to Him.
Today we went for basketball practice (we are all really bad so we need practice to be able to play against schools) and I was just really discouraged. I had to walk home by myself cause I needed to get back to go to small group. I was crying out to God and then I met a girl who is in highschool and got to walk and talk to her for a bit, then I met a group of kids and got to hang out with them for awhile, then I got to talk to an older lady. God gave me three little reminders of why I am here. I am here for to serve these people. Not when other people are around watching, but love them from a pure heart with the love from God. Man sees the deeds but God sees the heart behind the deeds. I just want Him to be able to look at my heart and smile because everything I do is for Him and for His glory. I say all this because I think that this is something we all deal with constantly. Maybe in different ways, but we all struggle with pride everyday. Satan puts this lie into each of our minds that we are the best, and that hinders us from serving Christ and coming together as the body of Christ. We need to become real and authentic, we need to be able to admit that we are prideful and messed up. I feel dumb having to admit how prideful I am, because it looks ridiculous but it's necessary. We need to keep each other in step. We are all just beggars showing other beggars where there is bread. If we can really understand that we are nothing and choose to live it out every day then God is going to use us to great things: not for ourselves but for His glory! How beautiful!
This past weekend we went out to the village to break ground for the training center that is going to be built there. It was such a wonderful day. I remember when I got here a year ago, all this was just a dream and plans on paper, but it is coming true and I feel so blessed to be here when all this is coming together. The plan is over the next 10 years a compound is going to be built consisting of a primary and a secondary school, a church, a trade school and dorms for kids and staff to live in. I am excited for how this is going to be used to bless so many lives and how it is going to bless the people in the community. The community came together for the ground breaking ceremony and we had a great party together. People are so excited for what is happening out there! Please pray that God will provide all the funds that are needed and that everything will go smoothly. Satan doesn't want this to happen so pray against his schemes!
I only have two months left! I can't believe it! I will be seeing you all so soon! I am so excited. I am seriously missing people back home more than ever! I love you! I would appreciate continued prayers. Please pray that God would give me the grace to be broken and to become less and less this summer so that He can become more! God bless!!
Craig
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Summer is in the air!
Hello everyone!
It's great to hear that it is finally warming up back home. Maybe it won't still be snowing by the time I get back!
I have been back from Kenya for two weeks. It's been pretty slow around here because schools have been on a month break. It gets boring sometimes, but it's been good to rest since we are gearing up for a crazy summer that is just about to begin. Next Monday 7 new volunteers arrive from the States and then for the rest of my trip people will be coming and going like crazy. I really haven't been excited about summer for the few months, and I kept wondering why. Recently, God revealed to me why I haven't been. It comes down to one word, but it's a big one...pride. I haven't been okay with having other people hear and "sharing" these children and responsibilities at projects. Honestly, that is such a horrible, horrible attitude. I am not here for me, I am here for God..to bring Him glory and to spread the hope of Jesus Christ. I so easily forget that and begin thinking of myself and what I want and need. However, God is working on me, changing my heart and reminding me of my "first love" and why I am here. I am realizing I am going to have to lead in a different way this summer. I am going to have to step back at times and let others step up. For me that is so hard, but it's huge part of what God is teaching and I welcome the challenge and how I will grow through it! Please pray for me to have the grace, patience and love this summer and that my attitude would be that of Christ who gave himself up for us. I want to glorify God with all of my life. Praise God for sanctification because I fall short every single day. "His mercies are new every morning!"
Here are a few things you can be praying for this summer:
1. Team unity
2. Provision for all that are coming
3. Grace and patience to lead and be an example for everyone new who comes in.
4. God to work and make His name known
5. That I would constantly remember why I am here and that I would be able to finish these last two months strong!
6. As I prepare to go home that God will be preparing my heart for all I encounter. It is going to be a struggle.
I can't believe I am so close to the end of my trip. As of today, I have been here for ten months. Praise God for all He has done and how He has stretched me and grown me. I love you all and I will see you very soon!!
Craig
It's great to hear that it is finally warming up back home. Maybe it won't still be snowing by the time I get back!
I have been back from Kenya for two weeks. It's been pretty slow around here because schools have been on a month break. It gets boring sometimes, but it's been good to rest since we are gearing up for a crazy summer that is just about to begin. Next Monday 7 new volunteers arrive from the States and then for the rest of my trip people will be coming and going like crazy. I really haven't been excited about summer for the few months, and I kept wondering why. Recently, God revealed to me why I haven't been. It comes down to one word, but it's a big one...pride. I haven't been okay with having other people hear and "sharing" these children and responsibilities at projects. Honestly, that is such a horrible, horrible attitude. I am not here for me, I am here for God..to bring Him glory and to spread the hope of Jesus Christ. I so easily forget that and begin thinking of myself and what I want and need. However, God is working on me, changing my heart and reminding me of my "first love" and why I am here. I am realizing I am going to have to lead in a different way this summer. I am going to have to step back at times and let others step up. For me that is so hard, but it's huge part of what God is teaching and I welcome the challenge and how I will grow through it! Please pray for me to have the grace, patience and love this summer and that my attitude would be that of Christ who gave himself up for us. I want to glorify God with all of my life. Praise God for sanctification because I fall short every single day. "His mercies are new every morning!"
Here are a few things you can be praying for this summer:
1. Team unity
2. Provision for all that are coming
3. Grace and patience to lead and be an example for everyone new who comes in.
4. God to work and make His name known
5. That I would constantly remember why I am here and that I would be able to finish these last two months strong!
6. As I prepare to go home that God will be preparing my heart for all I encounter. It is going to be a struggle.
I can't believe I am so close to the end of my trip. As of today, I have been here for ten months. Praise God for all He has done and how He has stretched me and grown me. I love you all and I will see you very soon!!
Craig
Saturday, April 16, 2011
A quick update from Kenya!
Hello everyone!
I have now been in Kenya for a week and a half. It has been a great time and God has truly been blessing this trip so far! The place we live is right in the middle of Kibera, a slum inhabited by over a million people. It's a place where poverty and hopelessness runs rampant. Last time I was in Kenya we arrived at the slum just after someone had jumped in front of a train to commit suicide. So many of these people have lost all hope for life. We spend quite a bit of time in the slum. Twice last week we got to go to a street boys home in Kibera and played soccer with them. I can't really talk to them because of the language barrier, but it's so great to be able to show them love through simple things like hugs and giving them time. Also, Thursday we spent a few hours walking around the slum stopping at peoples homes to share the hope of the Gospel with them and to encourage them in the Word and to pray with them. Even being on the mission field I have often forgotten the importance and urgency of sharing the Gospel. Evangelism isn't easy, it can be uncomfortable. It's much easier for me to sing songs with little kids and teach them Bible stories, but to go out amongst the people and share the hope of Jesus is something I find difficult. It shouldn't be! It is the greatest gift I could ever give to anyone! I want to get to a point where wherever I go I am spreading Christ's hope and love. I am not ashamed, but sometimes I am afraid. However, I have to remember I have God on my side. If He is for me nothing can be against me. That's enough for me.
Thank you everyone for your continued prayers! I will be doing ministry here for another week and then going to Mombasa, a tourist spot, to spend Easter weekend camping on the beach of the coast of the Indian Ocean! Also, please keep Uganda in your prayers as there have been some uprisings against the government which has resulted in the government lashing out. Please pray for safety and peace. Love you all!
I have now been in Kenya for a week and a half. It has been a great time and God has truly been blessing this trip so far! The place we live is right in the middle of Kibera, a slum inhabited by over a million people. It's a place where poverty and hopelessness runs rampant. Last time I was in Kenya we arrived at the slum just after someone had jumped in front of a train to commit suicide. So many of these people have lost all hope for life. We spend quite a bit of time in the slum. Twice last week we got to go to a street boys home in Kibera and played soccer with them. I can't really talk to them because of the language barrier, but it's so great to be able to show them love through simple things like hugs and giving them time. Also, Thursday we spent a few hours walking around the slum stopping at peoples homes to share the hope of the Gospel with them and to encourage them in the Word and to pray with them. Even being on the mission field I have often forgotten the importance and urgency of sharing the Gospel. Evangelism isn't easy, it can be uncomfortable. It's much easier for me to sing songs with little kids and teach them Bible stories, but to go out amongst the people and share the hope of Jesus is something I find difficult. It shouldn't be! It is the greatest gift I could ever give to anyone! I want to get to a point where wherever I go I am spreading Christ's hope and love. I am not ashamed, but sometimes I am afraid. However, I have to remember I have God on my side. If He is for me nothing can be against me. That's enough for me.
Thank you everyone for your continued prayers! I will be doing ministry here for another week and then going to Mombasa, a tourist spot, to spend Easter weekend camping on the beach of the coast of the Indian Ocean! Also, please keep Uganda in your prayers as there have been some uprisings against the government which has resulted in the government lashing out. Please pray for safety and peace. Love you all!
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